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 Improve Your RP: Body Language, Volume 1
 
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Kate
 Posted on Jun 23 2016, 02:12 PM
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Those who do not believe in magic will never find it.

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Introduction

Hello, and welcome to the first installment of the Improve Your RP series I'll be running for the group. In this volume, we'll be discussing one of the biggest factors in creating realistic characters: body language. Now, before we get started, let me make a few points:

1. Remember not to use this information to help your character meta-game, just keep it in mind when writing about your OWN character, unless he/she is unusually perceptive (and has that skill listed in his/her bio sheet).

2. The information provided here is not guaranteed to be 100% accurate, nor do I claim to be a specialist in this field. I am merely gathering information from the web and presenting it here for your use. You are more than welcome to do your own reading!

3. Each Quote section mentions the site from which my information was found. Feel free to do some reading of your own on those sites too! http://files.b1.jcink.com/html/emoticons/smile.gif

Other Volumes

Vol 2 - RP Battles
Vol 3 - Magic & Psionics

Navigation

Head & Face
Arms & Hands
Torso
Legs & Feet
Closing Comments

Quick Reference Charts


Click the links below for handy charts that summarize various gestures. Charts captured from this article
Eyes & Eyebrows
Mouth & Lips
Head & Face
Arms
Hands (Long one!)
Handshakes
Legs & Feet
Personal Space


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Kate
 Posted on Jun 23 2016, 02:14 PM
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Those who do not believe in magic will never find it.

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Head and Face




The Fake Smile


QUOTE (Lifehacker.com)
One of the easiest to learn about (though still one of the hardest to accurately identify) is the "fake smile". As the Paul Ekman International blog (named for the pioneer in facial expression analysis Paul Ekman) explains, fake smiles—the kind we make because we're supposed to—are most often done with just the mouth. We know to raise the corners of our mouths to smile. A lot fewer of us are aware of how much our eyes are involved in a proper smile. In a real smile, our eyebrows, eyelids, and sometimes even our whole head turn upwards, along with the corners of our mouths. This test from the BBC can let you try your hand at telling the real smiles from the fake ones.


You may have seen characters around the forum mention smiles that "don't reach the eyes" or that only move the lips. In these instances, the authors of that post are indicating that their character's are using the Fake Smile rather than a genuine one. In many cases, the characters aren't being malicious in nature, they're simply being polite -- sometimes even when they don't like the person they're talking to, or they're in a bad mood. If you see another character using the Fake Smile toward you, don't take offense right away! Look for other cues, described in the following posts, to determine how that character might truly be feeling toward yours.

Here are some examples of fake smiles versus real ones. Notice how in the images on the right, the whole face seems to be involved in the smile, whereas in the images on the left, only the mouth seems to smile.
user posted image



Pursed Lips


QUOTE (Lifehacker.com)
Pursed lips are another way to tell when someone is drifting over to the discomfort side of the spectrum. This is a favorite expression analysts like to point out whenever a politician is giving some form of confession. In cases like Anthony Weiner and Eliot Spitzer's confession speeches, both can be seen tightening their lips, pursing them to the point they nearly disappear.


Here is an exaggerated example of pursed lips:
user posted image


Perked Lips/Duckface


QUOTE (study-body-language.com)
Perking the lips - AKA the "duck face" or the "kissing face". It's a flirtatious, playful and "cute" gesture, but only when done right and in the right amounts. Keep it light and save it for the right moments. Blowing air kisses to your boyfriend is cute, taking every other picture with this pose is just ridiculous.


While there isn't much call for this expression in RP unless we're RPing a selfie-taking situation, you might get creative and come up with a unique way to work this expression into an RP that doesn't involve a selfie stick. http://files.b1.jcink.com/html/emoticons/wink.gif


Blinking


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
The normal blink rate is six to eight times a minute. But under stress, you’ll blink more often and somewhat more dramatically. Want to know who’s freaking out and who’s as cool as a cucumber at the next big meeting? The eyes have it.


Another subtle gesture that doesn't always show up in RP posts, but could be useful. Try working it into a post the next time you want to show that your character is stressed out!


Biting/Nibbling Your Lips


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
If you bite, suck on, or lick your lips when under pressure or in an awkward situation, you’re attempting to comfort or soothe yourself, says psychologist Carol Kinsey Goman, the author of The Nonverbal Advantage.


Keep in mind that lip biting as a flirtatious gesture is different from biting when nervous. If you nibble your lip when you're nervous, the movement will often be accompanied by other indications that you're unsettled, like blinking too often, fidgeting with the hands, pacing around the room, and so on.


Scratching Your Nose


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Don’t get caught in a lie. “When a person fibs, it’s often accompanied by an adrenaline rush,” says psychologist Michael Cunningham, a professor of communication at the University of Louisville. This release causes capillaries to expand, making the nose itch. Another tall-tale tell: a sustained glance. A liar often overcompensates for being perceived as shifty by focusing a bit too intently on the person he is fibbing to.


This one would be an easy one to work into an RP post, especially if you have a character that is normally fidgety anyway. In most cases, the person doing the nose scratching isn't really aware that he's doing it, either, so it'd take some doing to learn to stop this habit. Additionally, consider looking for this habit as a 'Tell' when playing poker with other characters!


Darting Glances


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
This catch-your-eye game, usually played in guy-girl situations, tends to mirror your scattered thoughts. Does he like me? Do I like him? Do I want him to come over here? Also, unlike a direct gaze, the back-and-forth variety is a protective measure: If he doesn’t approach you, you won’t feel rejected.


Darting glances are difficult for the person being glanced at to detect. So, if someone has posted that their character keeps darting glances your way, why not try rolling a die to see if your character spots it or not? You can also PM the member whose post it is and ask them what they'd prefer, then work something out that suits everyone. Sometimes, the RP is more entertaining if things don't go as expected!


Lowering Your Gaze


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
This meek gesture is an unconscious bid for public support—a favorite tactic of small children, not to mention the late Princess Diana. It often elicits a parental response. If someone does it to you, she may be searching for your empathy. Be gentle.


This gesture is sometimes also used by women to flirt with men, or to make them feel more protective over them. If the character is perceived to be meek and innocent, they may have increased appeal to different character types when interacting. Remember, however, that if your character is generally full of bravado, behaves in an outwardly confident manner and is otherwise outgoing, a lowering of the gaze like this will seem out of place. It could tip others off that your character is not being completely honest, or is specifically trying to sway others to see things his/her way.


Tilting Your Head


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Cock your head to the side when hearing a friend’s sob story. This movement indicates that you’re interested and listening. On a more literal level, you’re revealing and angling your ear to her, physically showing that you want to hear every detail.


This one is pretty straightforward and definitely easy to spot. If you see another character tipping his/her head to the side, it's okay to assume that they're interested in your story and want to hear more! Additionally, they may be curious or confused about a certain detail and need to hear more about it from you before everything will become clear to them.


Raising Your Eyebrows


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
“Raised eyebrows, one or both, is a true expression of piqued curiosity and interest, while lowered eyebrows can indicate negative emotions, such as confusion and fear,” says Laura Guerrero, a professor of communication at the Arizona State University Hugh Downs School of Human Communication, in Tempe. If you’re not interested in a good or bad way, your face will remain still and unanimated.


Raised eyebrows can also indicate surprise. If you're speaking to a character who suddenly raises his/her brows, it isn't automatically because they're happy about what you've said.


Looking Up, To The Side, Or Down


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Want a little glimpse into the way someone’s memory works? Notice where the person moves her eyes. When recalling something that was seen, a person will angle her eyes skyward, as if trying to picture it. When remembering something heard, she will look toward one of her ears, as if listening for it. Especially emotional experiences tend to be relived through introspective downward glances.


Additionally, closing your eyes is an attempt to shut out memories or sights/sounds happening around you.


Massaging The Forehead or Earlobes


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
These soothing actions counter feelings of uneasiness or vulnerability—for example, when you are seated in the front row of a lecture hall and hope not to be called on. The same goes for hugging your sides or rubbing your legs when you’re sitting. Stroking the nerve endings in some of these body parts helps lower blood pressure and heart rate.


A facepalm might also be considered to be part of this gesture, as the person making the gesture might be attempting to prevent himself from having an outburst of temper or other unpleasant behavior.

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Kate
 Posted on Jun 23 2016, 02:23 PM
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Those who do not believe in magic will never find it.

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Arms & Hands


"Our arms are heavily employed in self-expression. Many individual gestures can be taught or trained in us over time (such as "don't point at people"), but there are two more helpful aspects of arm and hand motion to observe: how much space they take up, and how high they reach.

Gravity-defying gestures, in any part of the body, are generally seen as positive. When we're happy, excited, or interested, we raise our heads or our chin, our arms go up, even our legs and feet start to point skyward or bounce if we're sitting. The arms are incredibly versatile at highlighting this behavior." (Lifehacker.com)


Excitement


QUOTE (lifehacker.com)
When excited, we don't restrict our arm movements; in fact our natural tendency is to defy gravity and raise our arms high above our heads. When people are truly energized and happy, their arm motions defy gravity. As previously mentioned, gravity-defying behaviors are associated with positive feelings. When a person feels good or confident, he swings his arms affirmatively, such as while walking. It is the insecure person who subconsciously restrains his arms, seemingly unable to defy the weight of gravity.


Exuberant waving at a good friend you see on the street might indicate how excited you are to see that friend, versus a casual wave meant for someone you know only slightly, or see every day and aren't as enthusiastic about meeting.


Sadness, "Down in the Dumps"


QUOTE (lifehacker.com)
Candidly tell a colleague about a drastic and costly mistake she just made at work and her shoulders and arms will sink down and droop. Ever have that "sinking feeling"? It's a limbic response to a negative event. Negative emotions bring us down physically. Not only are these limbic responses honest, but they happen in real time. We leap and thrust our arms in the air the moment the point is scored, or our shoulders and arms sink when a referee rules against us. These gravity-related behaviors communicate emotions accurately and at the precise moment we are affected. Further, these physical manifestations can be contagious, whether at a football stadium, a rock concert, or in a gathering of great friends.


Your character doesn't have to be standing up for his shoulders and arms to slump, either. He can be sitting down, too, but laying down would be a very difficult position to use the slumped shoulder gesture in.


Crossing Your Arms


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Don’t be too quick to leap to conclusions: This pose doesn’t always mean anger, but when coupled with crossed legs, it is a defensive position. Take note of the surroundings. More often than not, this stance means a person is cold. Also, many people simply find it comfortable, says Cunningham.



Open Hands


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
By spreading your hands as if serving someone a treat off a tray, you are indicating that you are open to new ideas being offered. Facing your palms down or clenching your fists shows you have a strong position—one that may not be so flexible.



Hiding Your Hands


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Stashing your hands in your lap, stuffing them in your pockets, and holding them behind your back are movements of deceit—you’re hiding something. “A person may be telling you one thing, but these cues indicate you’re not getting the whole story,” says Barbee.



Picking At Nails


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Messing with cuticles is a sign of low confidence and timidity.



Steepling Your Fingers


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Try steepling your fingers (hands folded together with index fingers extended) so you can’t pick and you instead appear self-assured.

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Kate
 Posted on Jun 23 2016, 02:25 PM
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Those who do not believe in magic will never find it.

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Torso


Leaning


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
No surprise here: You lean toward people you like and pull away from those you don’t. On a date? Take note of your companion’s direction—and yours. Subtly mirroring movements builds trust.


Additionally, consider this: leaning toward someone when you don't actually trust them (as in, making the conscious effort to lean toward someone) can make them believe that you trust them. This can cause the others to come to trust you, because they believe that they have earned your trust first. It can also indicate that you believe in what you're talking about, and that you're being honest. Couple the lean-foward gesture with some other body language gestures - like facing someone squarely, nodding, or tilting your head at them as they speak - to pack a real punch.


Protecting the Torso


QUOTE (lifehack.com)
Our ventral (front) side, where our eyes, mouth, chest, breasts, genitals, etc. are located, is very sensitive to things we like and dislike. When things are good, we expose our ventral sides toward what we favor, including those people who make us feel good. When things go wrong, relationships change, or even when topics are discussed that we disfavor, we will engage in ventral denial, by shifting or turning away. The ventral side is the most vulnerable side of the body, so the limbic brain has an inherent need to protect it from the things that hurt or bother us. This is the reason, for example, we immediately and subconsciously begin to turn slightly to the side when someone we dislike approaches us at a party. When it comes to courtship, an increase in ventral denial is one of the best indicators that the relationship is in trouble.


Giving the 'cold shoulder' to someone (or turning away from them when they come to you for support, to talk, etc.), is an indication that you are displeased with them, or that you don't like them personally. It's another form of 'ventral denial' as mentioned above. Your instincts are telling you that the other person might be a threat, and you're protecting your vital organs.

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Kate
 Posted on Jun 23 2016, 02:33 PM
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Those who do not believe in magic will never find it.

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Legs & Feet

QUOTE (lifehacker.com)
If you had to guess which part of the body is the most honest, most people would guess that it's eyes or possibly the face as a whole. In reality, we're way off. The legs and feet, suggests Navarro, are where the real honesty lies. After all, we're trained throughout most of our life to smile for the camera, stop making faces, and to pretend to have a good time. However, millions of years of evolution have taught us that our legs need to be ready to escape.

One key way to detect the leg's intention is to notice where the feet and legs are pointing. Similar to the way we point our chests, our lower extremities tend to lean or point in the direction of where we'd like to go or what we're most interested in:

When two people talk to each other, they normally speak toe to toe. If, however, one of the individuals turns his feet slightly away or repeatedly moves one foot in an outward direction (in an L formation with one foot toward you and one away from you), you can be assured he wants to take leave or wishes he were somewhere else. This type of foot behavior is another example of an intention cue (Givens, 2005, 60–61). The person's torso may remain facing you out of social diligence, but the feet may more honestly reflect the limbic brain's need or desire to escape.
On the flip side, crossed legs—particularly while standing—are a relatively strong indicator that a person is interested in staying where they are. This is tied pretty deeply into our survival instinct. While we may pretend to be having a good time, crossing the legs makes it more difficult to escape danger. Even if we might know that there's no immediate physical danger at a social gathering we want to leave, our brains still respond to the discomfort in the same way: by preparing to move away from here.



Toes Pointed In


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Even if you’re sitting up straight with your shoulders aligned and your head up—all signs of an open body position—your feet may be betraying you. If they’re cocked inward, big toe to big toe, this indicates that you’re closing yourself off because you feel awkward or insecure.


Or it could indicate that you really need to pee... Still, as mentioned above, your feet and legs are the most honest indicator of how you really feel. So pay attention to those tootsies!


Toes Pointed Toward The Door


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
When you’re having a conversation with someone but her feet are angled toward the door, she may be unconsciously saying that she’s ready to cut the talk short and move on.



Crossing Your Legs


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Pay attention to the direction in which you cross your legs. In a seated conversation, people tend to point the toes of the top leg toward the person who they feel is the most approachable. The kicker? Lifting your toes means your feelings toward said person are extra-positive.



Fidgeting


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
Ever notice that you become more physically active—you tap your heels, slide in and out of your shoes, bop your foot up and down while crossing your legs—the more uncomfortable you feel? This is because these kinds of moves relieve tension. Fidgeting may also mean that you want out of a situation and your body is getting ready to take flight. The bottom line? At least in professional settings, cross your ankles to calm those fidgety feet.


So, rather than indicating that your character is fidgety just because you want to add some filler to the post, why not skim through and see what other body language you can add that more closely fits what your character is feeling at the time?


Shifting Weight


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
“The way you move your body reflects your attitude,” says Goman. Constantly transferring your weight from one foot to the other or rocking forward and backward is a comforting movement that indicates you are anxious or upset. Basically, this is a physical representation of what is going on in your head: You are betwixt and between many unsettling thoughts and can’t stop moving from one to the other.




Standing with Legs Apart


QUOTE (realsimple.com)
This position, feet and legs shoulder-width apart, signals dominance and determination, says Goman. When asserting your side of an argument or discussion, stand your ground—literally. For an extra boost, place your hands on your hips. This is a traditional position of power.


Remember also that legs are used for balance. Someone standing on the swaying deck of a ship would need to stand with his legs apart in order to maintain balance, so he's not necessarily signaling for dominance or trying to make a statement. He just doesn't want to fall over on his face and injure himself, or look like an idiot in front of his friends.

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Kate
 Posted on Jun 23 2016, 02:34 PM
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Those who do not believe in magic will never find it.

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Closing Comments


QUOTE (businessballs.com)
Body language is especially crucial when we meet someone for the first time.

We form our opinions of someone we meet for the first time in just a few seconds, and this initial instinctual assessment is based far more on what we see and feel about the other person than on the words they speak. On many occasions we form a strong view about a new person before they speak a single word.

Consequently body language is very influential in forming impressions on first meeting someone.

The effect happens both ways - to and from:

When we meet someone for the first time, their body language, on conscious and unconscious levels, largely determines our initial impression of them.
In turn when someone meets us for the first time, they form their initial impression of us largely from our body language and non-verbal signals.
And this two-way effect of body language continues throughout communications and relationships between people.

Body language is constantly being exchanged and interpreted between people, even though much of the time this is happening on an unconscious level.

Remember - while you are interpreting (consciously or unconsciously) the body language of other people, so other people are constantly interpreting yours.


The same article also says that body language cues do NOT include verbal ones, such as stammering, speaking loudly, pausing frequently or talking too quickly. While these can sometimes be a good indicator of a person's emotional state, that's not always the case. For example, people who are shy may stumble over their words - OR - people who lie may stumble over their words - OR - children may stumble over their words. Stumbling over words does not automatically indicate a single outcome.


Context


QUOTE (businessballs.com)
Body language also depends on context: body language in a certain situation might not mean the same in another.

Some 'body language' isn't what it seems at all, for example:





  • Someone rubbing their eye might have an irritation, rather than being tired - or disbelieving, or upset.




  • Someone with crossed arms might be keeping warm, rather than being defensive.




  • Someone scratching their nose might actually have an itch, rather than concealing a lie.






Age & Gender


QUOTE (businessballs.com)
Many body language signals are relative.

A gesture by one person in a certain situation can carry far more, or very little meaning, compared to the same gesture used by a different person in a different situation.

Young men for example often display a lot of pronounced gestures because they are naturally energetic, uninhibited and supple. Older women, relatively, are less energetic, adopt more modest postures, and are prevented by clothing and upbringing from exhibiting very pronounced gestures.

So when assessing body language - especially the strength of signals and meanings - it's important to do so in relative terms, considering the type of person and situation involved.


Always take into account the character you're RPing with. As an example, the character Myr (View App Here) has a habit of speaking quickly, tilting her head, and asking many questions. For her, that's a normal habit that she does on a daily basis, almost regardless of what mood she's in. However, if a character like Donas (View App Here) were to behave in the same way, it would be completely out of character for him and may indicate he's been drugged with a mind-altering substance, or someone has cast a spell upon him.


Faking & Deception


QUOTE (businessballs.com)
Some people artificially control their outward body language to give the impression they seek to create at the time.

A confident firm handshake, or direct eye contact, are examples of signals which can be quite easily be 'faked' - usually temporarily, but sometimes more consistently.

However while a degree of faking is possible, it is not possible for someone to control or suppress all outgoing signals.

This is an additional reason to avoid superficial analysis based on isolated signals, and to seek as many indicators as possible, especially subtle clues when suspecting things might not be what they seem. Politicians and manipulative salespeople come to mind for some reason.

Looking for 'micro gestures' (pupils contract, an eyebrow lifts, corner of the mouth twitch) can help identify the true meaning and motive behind one or two strong and potentially false signals.

These micro gestures are very small, difficult to spot and are subconscious, but we cannot control them, hence their usefulness.



Boredom, Nervousness & Insecurity


QUOTE (businessballs.com)
Many body language signals indicate negative feelings such as boredom, disinterest, anxiousness, insecurity, etc.

The temptation on seeing such signals is to imagine a weakness on the part of the person exhibiting them.

This can be so, however proper interpretation of body language should look beyond the person and the signal - and consider the situation, especially if you are using body language within personal development or management. Ask yourself:

What is causing the negative feelings giving rise to the negative signals?

It is often the situation, not the person - for example, here are examples of circumstances which can produce negative feelings and signals in people, often even if they are strong and confident:

- dominance of a boss or a teacher or other person perceived to be in authority
- overloading a person with new knowledge or learning
- tiredness
- stress caused by anything
- cold weather or cold conditions
- lack of food and drink
- illness or disability
- alcohol or drugs
- being in a minority or feeling excluded
- unfamiliarity - newness - change

Ask yourself, when analyzing body language:
Are there external factors affecting the mood and condition of the individual concerned?
Do not jump to conclusions - especially negative ones - using body language analysis alone.






Remember: Body language isn't an exact science. There are lots of reasons that characters might do any number of these things, regardless of what studies say about them. Keep that in mind when you're RPing, and remember that your character is not a god and cannot say for certain what another character is doing, even if you, the real-life player, knows.

These Body Language tips are for enhancing your character, providing depth to both him AND your RP experiences. Use them as much or as little as you like, but don't expect everyone else to use them the same way that you do.

The best way to use them is to look for several signs all at once. If all of them seem to indicate the same thing (for example, they all indicate that a character is lying), then you're most likely correct. If you only see a single mention of body language in a post, it is generally NOT okay to make assumptions about that character.

Example:From businessballs.com
crossed arms = possibly defensive
crossed arms + crossed legs = probably defensive
crossed arms + crossed legs + frowning + clenched fists = definitely defensive, and probably hostile too.

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